Dealing with emotional separation

Dealing with emotional separation

posted in: Parchment | 0

Relationship is a cardinal principle in my definition of success. I believe that the quality of our lives, to a large extent, reflects the quality of our relationships. Yet, as important as it is to connect and associate with people, we must also realise that separation is inevitable.

Drawing inspiration from Genesis 12:1-3 and Queen of Katwe, a 2016 biographical movie about Phiona Mutesi, a Ugandan girl who rose from the slums of Katwe, Kampala to become national chess champion, Pastor Sam Adeyemi teaches that any vision God gives you will be radically different from where you are, and you can’t get there by remaining where you are. Find excerpts below.

Vision: The Key to Transformation -Pastor Sam Adeyemi

This year, God is giving us new dreams. We should be prepared to think big. Vision is the ability to see people, places and things not just the way they are but the way they could be. Seeing people, places and things the way they are is a function of your physical eyes. Seeing them the way they could be is a function of your inner faculties, your imagination. Few people leverage their imagination for transformation. It is imagination that helps us see beyond our limitations. For us as Christians, the ultimate vision is a revelation from God (Proverbs 29:18). When God gives you a vision, the future is a done deal. Vision begins with you. It’s difficult to be able to see for other people and other places if you can’t see for yourself.

When God gives you a vision, the future is a done deal. -@Sam_Adeyemi cc: @DaystarNG Pls RT Click To Tweet

Vision causes separation. If God ever shows you anything, it will be radically different from where you are; and you can’t get there by remaining where you are. As long as you stay where you are, you won’t even see it. The lack of willingness to endure the pain of separation is the reason many people are stranded where they are.

“Sometimes where you are used to is not where you belong. What you believe is where you belong.” [Click to tweet]

Where you’re used to and emotionally invested in, is not where you belong. A lot of the time you can’t see where you’re going if you stay where you are. You need to define who, what and where you need to leave to fulfil your destiny. There are relationships and associations that won’t allow you to see where you’re going because they define your present and hold you down there. There are organisations that may be good for your past or even your present but cannot take you where you ought to be. They won’t even allow you to see the road. And some of them are not bad. It’s just a matter of seasons. People who experience radical changes in their lives learn to manage emotional separation because it is inevitable. An organisation must learn to move. Managing those transitions is what leadership is about.

Most people are stranded because they're not willing to endure the pain of separation -@Sam_Adeyemi Click To Tweet

Sometimes you have to separate from some activities. When Daystar started, I used to name every baby and conduct every wedding. I love to be part of people’s joy and the beginning of a new destiny. But I had to decide whether I wanted the church to grow or whether I wanted to continue naming babies. Imagine me naming every baby and conducting every wedding now; there will be nothing to preach on Sunday.

Come out from that level. There is a new level for you. Who do you need to leave? What do you need to leave? Some of us don’t know that we can be emotionally invested in poverty. Take the Israelites for instance. When they were in the wilderness, they longed for the garlic, onions and cucumbers of Egypt. And it wasn’t like they were living well in Egypt. They were living in slums! Leave what you’re used to. Leave your comfort zone.

Sometimes you have to leave what is working. It’s not because Abraham was not doing well that God asked him to move; he was thriving! God won’t show some people the vision He has for them because He knows it will be a waste of resources. God needs to see that you’re willing to move. It’s hip to be part of the hood but your destiny may not be in the hood.

When your life begins to change you have to make important choices at some points. There is something about making risky moves that if you don’t have a coach to encourage you along, you might be crippled by self doubt. Everyone should have a coach. I remember when our church started to grow, my pastor taught me that I must be willing to keep moving. He said, “Life is a journey, not a station. Those who are trying to make it a station end up in frustration.”

Life is a journey. Those who are trying to make it a station end up in frustration. HT@Sam_Adeyemi Click To Tweet

Feel free to unfreeze your thinking. There are new dimensions. Do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind (Romans 12:2). Where you are used to is not where you belong. Where do you belong? It is vision that answers that question for you. Vision answered the question for Joseph and David. The answer to your situation is not in your problems, it’s in your vision. You have no excuse for being stranded. And I declare in Jesus’ name, you will not be stranded.

Your Turn

So, that’s it. I’ve tried to capture the essence of the message but there’s a lot more. I couldn’t help giggling at the hilarious comments and illustrations sprinkled throughout the message. To get the full message, click here to tweet at DaystarNG and ask for Vision: The Key to Transformation (The message of Sunday, January 15, 2017). If you’d like to have a one-sentence summary to keep the message fresh on your mind, click here to download a wallpaper.

Question: How have you dealt with emotional separation in fulfilling your vision? Share with us in the comments and you could get yourself a copy of the full message or some other useful resources.

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